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March 15, 1999

Secret CIO:
The Flip-Through Review

A few random paragraphs can tell you whether a book is worth spending time with

By Herbert W. Lovelace

lot of free books cross my desk. Back before I could afford it, I would have to shell out my own money whenever I wanted to learn something about a leading technology that could help me in my job--or, in my never-ending quest to improve myself, read up on the latest glib business theory from some professor or high-priced consultant.

This self-help education wasn't cheap. While business books aren't as costly as the textbooks I used in college, they do cost more than popular novels--and they're rarely as interesting. As I moved up in the organization, vendors decided to take the approach that they wanted to be my partner as opposed to simply my supplier, and concluded that giving me free books was one way to convince me they were no longer crass sales types but rather serious solution providers.

At first, I became overwhelmed with my new-found literary cornucopia. I tried to read everything. My initial rationale was that I should show at least a little gratitude to the people who had sent me these tomes by trying to read them. Second, even if I wasn't particularly interested in the vendor, it made a lot of sense to become familiar with the latest concepts and buzzwords.

Soon, I was inundated by books. Not only was I overwhelmed by the stacks growing on my credenza at the office and my night table at home, but I was also bored to tears. The only saving grace was that regardless of the stress of the particular day, I had a sure-fire way to put myself to sleep at night--just start reading one of these books.

Then I hit upon the method I use to this day to simultaneously make sure I can discuss the books I receive, fulfill my obligations to the sender, and weed out all the mind-numbing and trite stuff. I take each book, balance its spine on my desk, and thumb through the pages as if the book were a deck of cards. Then I open the book at random and read an arbitrary paragraph. I then grade the paragraph based on triteness, needless complexity, and overall pomposity. This little ritual is repeated four more times.

I mentally total the score and I'm set.

I know whether I should read the book--and if not, I have gleaned enough silly phrases to be able to hold my own at the cocktail parties that punctuate the conferences we CIOs attend at fancy resorts while everyone else is back in the office working.

My little method has provided me with some real gems that I will share with you. Although I haven't read the books

(I disclose this fact in the interest of honesty, and also because to have read them would have been to invalidate the purpose of what I was doing), I can report that there's no shortage of business books that are best avoided. One of my recent "favorites" scored an all-time high of 15 points (a solid three on each of the five random paragraphs). I'm still puzzling over what it means to "construct a reality punctuated value network." Of course, to paraphrase Rhett Butler, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a paradigm."

I don't know if others use this method, which works so well for me. Maybe they do--or perhaps my colleagues are smarter than I am and really understand all of the stuff being published in the name of educating us. Or maybe they're simply parroting phrases that they don't understand any better than I do. Beware, however, if you hear phrases at IT gatherings such as "Our belief structures and systems are our replicators" and, of course, any variant of the ever-popular "Our business model paradigm is holistically derived." If you hear such verbiage, you're dealing with either a real insomniac or someone else who has figured out the Lovelace Easy Book Review Method.

Herbert W. Lovelace is the CIO at a multibillion-dollar international company. Herb practices his day job under an alias and has changed the names of colleagues to protect the guilty. Send him E-mail at lovelace@home.com. He'll provide real answers--and whimsical comments--to your questions on InformationWeek Online at www.informationweek.com.