Topics: Digital Life

Keeping Track Of What?

Posted by Michael Hickins, Mar 6, 2009 05:54 PM

Talk about a superfluous use of technology. The State Department launched a new interactive travel map for tracking Hillary Clinton's peripatetic adventures across the globe. Gee-whiz! It's not enough for me to read about where she's been -- I need to visualize it on a map!

If the new administration really wants to impress us with its tech savvy, it could start by posting new bills before they're signed so that we can comment, as President Obama promised.

On the other hand, the map got me thinking about the kinds of things it would be nice to track:

The TARP funds. Here's a billion dollars leaving the Fed building in New York. Where's it going? Looks like it's headed up the street to Citi. Now it's going to Kennedy Airport and boarding a plane for China. Stay tuned for the further adventures of Bill the American Dollar.

Bernie Madoff. So far, he's managed to avoid jail time by serving house arrest. Let's make sure he doesn't join Allen Stanford in Antigua.

Jobs. They got sucked into Mexico. Then they went to Bangalore, then China, Bolivia, and now … where's the intergalactic black hole on this map?

PC Shipments. If you're reading this, presumably you've got one of those. Where are the other ones headed?

GE's stock price. Oh wait, that's not a map. It's a chart. Or maybe it's a funeral. Hard to tell the difference these days. Check PC shipments above.

Eliot Spitzer. He's back in Washington, D.C., supposedly working on a real estate deal. But who's he trying to kid -- we all know the real estate market is dead. Is that the way to the Mayflower Hotel?

A-Rod. There he goes on a private jet from his cousin's house in Miami, the limo ride to Madonna's East Side penthouse, back on a flight to Tampa, then to Colorado to get his hip examined. Every move is a front-page story waiting to happen.

The new head of the GOP. Oh wait, we don't know who that is. Maybe we can track both Rush Limbaugh and Michael Steele and see if their paths ever cross. That would be one car crash I'd be willing to pay for the privilege of watching.

Random asteroids. If one is ever headed straight for us, we'll get to watch Bruce Willis try to save the planet.

Bill Clinton. Where does he stay when Hillary is in Washington? Do they even share the same residence? Check to see if his path crosses Eliot Spitzer's.

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Keeping Track Of What?