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Facebook F8: 10 Things Zuckerberg Won't Say

There's no truth to the rumor that a prototype of the next Facebook was left at a bar in Cambridge last night.

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Poor Zuck. Those friends of his are getting snarky. Facebook users all over the Web decried his team's latest round of interface "enhancements," which most people saw Wednesday morning. As InformationWeek's Tom LaSusa put it in a spot-on column, it's like artificial intelligence, or perhaps the dark side's imperial guard, now decides what you want to see most in your Facebook news feed.

Thursday, Facebook kicks off its annual F8 conference for developers; look for coverage from InformationWeek.com's Thomas Claburn. Speculation centers on last year's "like" button being joined by a new "listen" button having to do with new music partners, and perhaps a new iPad app.

It's been a heavy news week, what with HP CEO Leo Apotherker's job on the line, the SSL protocol (crucial to Web communications) facing new security threats and Google defending itself before a Senate panel on antitrust issues.

So let's lighten up, and take a look at 10 things Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg will not tell developers today:

10."We're betting our tablet strategy on Windows 8."

9. "I just hope those HP board members understand Facebook's latest round of privacy changes."

8. "I am rolling out a new iPad app--in collaboration with The Gap: Sign up now and get a limited edition hoodie."

7. "Google got grilled by senators yesterday for wanting to rule the world? Better them than me."

6. "I met the president earlier this year, you know."

5. "I Heard Google+ is the official social network of Dancing With the Stars."

4. "Yes, I did make the top 20 on the Forbes 400 List of Richest Americans this week. I'm setting aside 5% of next year's profits to the hair stylist who can do something with this mop of mine."

3. "Those guys in Greece with the bad economy? That's what happens when you turn all your settings to "friends only" so no one can capitalize on your data."

2." There's no truth to the rumor that a prototype of the next Facebook was left at a bar in Cambridge last night."

1. "You all heard my sister, Randi, has left the company. I'm delighted to announce I'm replacing her with not one but two great minds: The Winklevoss twins!"

Laurianne McLaughlin is editor-in-chief for InformationWeek.com. Follow her on Twitter at @lmclaughlin.

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