IT Pros: Live Long And Eat Your Coffee Cup - InformationWeek

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2/27/2015
10:40 AM
David Wagner
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IT Pros: Live Long And Eat Your Coffee Cup

Drinking coffee will extend your life. Why not drink it out of an edible cup?

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Excluding, perhaps, long-haul truckers, I would have guessed that the highest coffee-drinking profession was IT pros. I was disappointed to find out that IT pros aren't even among the top 15 coffee-drinking professions. I can only assume that's because you've moved on to something stronger, like injecting Red Bull directly into your veins. But rejoice, IT pros, you can now go back to coffee, because a government panel of nutritionists says that drinking up to five cups of coffee per day is not only totally fine but may help you live longer.

If you guzzle black coffee all day, not only will you have no negative side effects, but the antioxidants in the coffee might help you avoid cancer, Parkinson's Disease, Type 2 Diabetes, and heart disease. If you can’t deal with coffee specifically, caffeine is the main reason for these effects. Remember, though, if you consume your caffeine in soda or other sugary forms, you are giving up a lot of the benefits, especially the protections from Type 2 Diabetes and probably from cancer.

Same thing with the cream and sugar. You're discarding many of the health benefits if you add those. So drink coffee black for your health -- not for the reason this guy does it.

That's the good news. Here's the bad news. Nutritionists say that 400 mg of caffeine is a good, healthy dose. Some coffee has more caffeine than others. For the stuff you brew at home, that's about five cups. You know how much caffeine is in a Venti Starbucks coffee? 415 mg.

[ If coffee won't kill us, what will? Read No, AI Won't Kill Us All. ]

Still, I think this is good news for coffee drinkers and IT pros in general. But here's the thing, IT pros. You guys are lagging on your coffee consumption. Even writers and editors like me outdrink you guys.

Scientists drink the most coffee, but do you know who beats you in your own enterprise? PR and marketing. They're no. 2 among all caffeine-consuming professions. HR folks also crush you all. If you can't drink more coffee for the pride of your department, at least do it for your health.

If you can't do it for pride or for health, do it so you can eat the cup. The cup? You heard me. KFC UK is now testing coffee in an edible cup. They are calling it the Scoff-ee cup. And yes, I scoff. It is a cookie cup wrapped in edible sugar paper. The inside of the cookie is lined with "heat-resistant white chocolate." Because, let’s be honest, nothing says yummy like the words heat-resistant. Also, while paper may be treated like a delicacy in the UK, outside of the empire it is generally treated as something to recycle rather than to eat.

The topper is that the cups smell like grass and sunscreen, so they "remind you of a warm summer’s day on the beach." Yes, because I always associate piping hot coffee with hot summer days.

Let’s all sing it together: "The best part of waking up, is eating your coffee cup."

Look at this woman.

(Image: KFC via Dailymail)

(Image: KFC via Dailymail)

Is this the face of a woman who should be trusted with hot coffee? That woman loves that cup just a little too much. Also, her bites are huge! She's like a beaver chomping down on a redwood to make a dam.

And what would KFC's iconic Colonel Sanders say? You figure he had to be a black-coffee drinker. All those long hours in the kitchen perfecting that secret blend of 11 herbs and spices. Aside from some sweet tea, no Kentucky colonel would get his caffeine any other way.

Also, the thing looks like a giant fortune cookie. You know that game where you add "in bed" to the end of a fortune-cookie fortune? Try it by adding "with chicken." Seriously, try it. Here is an Internet database of fortunes people have actually gotten. Try adding "with chicken" to them. Here are some examples:

  • "People are naturally attracted to you ... with chicken."
  • "You cannot love life until you live the life you love ... with chicken."
  • "Land is always on the mind of a flying bird ... with chicken."

Well, the last one is a little weird, but it works! KFC is totally missing out if they don't add this to the edible coffee cup. Think about it. You finish the cup and at the bottom is an edible paper fortune hidden under the chocolate heat shield, which I hear is also going to be used on the next generation of space shuttles. What more could you want after finishing a cup of coffee that will extend your life than paper sugar, which will shorten it, but also provide you with words of wisdom … with chicken?

So what do you think, IT pros? Is caffeine still a part of the IT Life? Do you prefer to get your caffeine in coffee, or are you chugging it in energy drinks and soda? Are you really going to live longer because of coffee? Are you hoping to trade in your boring old paper or Styrofoam cups for cookies, chocolate, and edible paper? Tell us in the comments section below.

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David has been writing on business and technology for over 10 years and was most recently Managing Editor at Enterpriseefficiency.com. Before that he was an Assistant Editor at MIT Sloan Management Review, where he covered a wide range of business topics including IT, ... View Full Bio
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Li Tan
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Li Tan,
User Rank: Ninja
3/6/2015 | 4:49:42 AM
Re: Ewww, i'm not a goat
Donut mug - I love this idea! But when eating it, I am afraid of the extra energy it will give to me. For the moment I am still a thin and slim guy but how about being served by donut mug everyday?:-)
Kelly22
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Kelly22,
User Rank: Strategist
3/2/2015 | 9:19:44 AM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
That's a possibility. I also think that calorie-wise, the edible coffee cup is one of the more innocent menu items coming out of KFC. This is the same chain that's replacing bread with fried chicken - http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2015/01/26/double-dog-down-kfc-fried-chicken-hot-dog-sandwich/22350739/.
tzubair
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tzubair,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 7:40:00 PM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
"because society will benefit greatly by turning 0-calorie beverages into 2,000-calorie meals"

@swagv: Why can't you have something made out of diet sugar and other materials that wouldn't contribute towards the calories? Doesn't sound so impossible to me.
tzubair
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tzubair,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 7:23:59 PM
Re: Ewww, i'm not a goat
"I love bread bowls, you're right that it's a similar idea. Now you have me thinking whether we can apply the same concept to a donut mug filled with coffee..."

@kelly22: That sounds rather yum! I'd strongly suggest that you get this idea copyrighted under your name before someone else implements it :)
StaceyE
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StaceyE,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 12:02:06 PM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
@ swagv

It won't be long till someone is blaming KFC because they got up to 350 lbs because they started drinking the edible cup coffee...but it tastes soooo goooooood! 
StaceyE
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StaceyE,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 11:58:51 AM
Re: Ewww, i'm not a goat
The whole thought and description of the edible cup makes me want to gag a little. What happens if you forget your half filled cup of joe in the dash of your car and come back out after a long day at the office to find the cup has softened and allowed your coffee to run all over your car. Can't imagine this fad will last long at all.

 

I prefer my coffee strong and in a cup that might break if I drop it.
swagv
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swagv,
User Rank: Apprentice
2/28/2015 | 10:23:32 AM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
Yes, because society will benefit greatly by turning 0-calorie beverages into 2,000-calorie meals.
shamika
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shamika,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 9:02:00 AM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
@gray I agree with you, this will help us the save the environment with plastics.
shamika
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shamika,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 8:59:46 AM
Re: Positive Environmentalism
However I would prefer a cup of milk tea when I am tired. It will give me energy to continue my day.  
shamika
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shamika,
User Rank: Ninja
2/28/2015 | 8:56:44 AM
Re: Ewww, i'm not a goat
This is an interesting article. However I am not quite sure whether coffee is good for health.
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