Global CIO: The CIO's Christmas - InformationWeek

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Government // Enterprise Architecture
12:06 PM

Global CIO: The CIO's Christmas

A holiday poem, with apologies to Dr. Seuss

System cutover today
No worries, mate
Your job is in play!

You had visions of sugar plums
And projects so grand
Till the bean counters scolded
"Hey, pal, pound sand!"

Oh, the audit's a mess
The money you'll waste
Are you moving too slowly
With much too much haste?

You have brains in your head
But costs hit the roof
You're out of control!
Need any more proof?

Your network has crashed
For the umpteenth time
The CEO’s seething
Is downtime a crime?

Be cautious, be bold
Lead the charge up the hill
You've moved to the cloud
Better not spill!

Your staff gets no bonus
At least not this year
Cry if you want
There's no one to hear

You outsourced all things
You've killed the good goose
Our data's in Bangalore
Turn the dogs loose?

You believed their lies
You bought into the hype
Are you the Idiot
Who moved us to Skype?

You bought Bill his house
And Larry his boat
You've a black belt in spending
Now pull up the moat

But Christmas is near
So fulfill your thirst
IT will still be here
On January first!

Howard Anderson, founder of Yankee Group and co-founder of Battery Ventures, is currently the William Porter Professor of Entrepreneurship at MIT. He can be reached at [email protected].

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