Comments
An IT Admin Walks Into A Bar…
Newest First  |  Oldest First  |  Threaded View
<<   <   Page 2 / 4   >   >>
nomii
50%
50%
nomii,
User Rank: Ninja
8/8/2014 | 10:21:46 AM
Re: ha ha
@Jastroff a really nice one but to tell you the truth these things do happen with me on many occasions as well :)
nomii
IW Pick
100%
0%
nomii,
User Rank: Ninja
8/8/2014 | 10:07:57 AM
Re: ha ha
I am not sure its very much hilarious but I kinda like it

"Computers are like air conditioners: they stop working properly when you open windows."

:)
SaneIT
50%
50%
SaneIT,
User Rank: Ninja
8/8/2014 | 7:16:35 AM
IT humor
I've got a really good UDP joke to tell you, but I don't know if you'll get it
Technocrati
50%
50%
Technocrati,
User Rank: Ninja
8/8/2014 | 12:42:56 AM
Life is Often Funnier Than Fiction

I don't really know any IT jokes, but I do have a funny happenstance that occurred not too long ago.

A friend of mine was starting his new position as tech support. They low balled him of course but he was happy to have a job  - which I can certainly understand.

So his first major assignment was to take a software inventory of the entire company.  A couple of days later, I run into him at lunch and he looked kind of worried.  So I asked him how the inventory was going, upon which he goes on to tell me that during his presentation ( in front of his new bosses ) there seemed to be a discrepancy as to the actual number employees the company had.  

My friend reported 38 computers out while the CFO thought the number to be closer to 68.

My friend was really reeling from this apparent miscount and his missed opportunity to impress, so in an effort to lighten the mood, I told him that he was actually correct, the company may have 68 employees but only 38 of them actually need computers !

I thought this was hilarious, and still do quite frankly. My friend not so much.   Don't worry he is still working there.

glenbren
50%
50%
glenbren,
User Rank: Apprentice
8/7/2014 | 6:13:50 PM
Re: ha ha
An IT professional was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The IT professional took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess,   I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the IT professional took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The IT professional said, "Look I'm an IT professional. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."
Joe Stanganelli
100%
0%
Joe Stanganelli,
User Rank: Ninja
8/7/2014 | 5:52:30 PM
Re: ha ha
Q: How many tech support representatives does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None.  They just tell you to turn it off and on again.
Joe Stanganelli
50%
50%
Joe Stanganelli,
User Rank: Ninja
8/7/2014 | 5:50:16 PM
Re: ha ha
@vnewman: I originally heard that joke as, well, the cow having a controversial procedure instead of actually giving birth.

My favorite farm-related joke, perhaps:

On his way to a gig, a ventriloquist's car breaks down in a rural area near a farmhouse.  He knocks on the door and asks if he can use the farmer's phone to call a tow truck.  The farmer agrees.

After the phone call, while they're waiting for the truck, the farmer shows the ventriloquist around the farm.

They're in the stables, and the farmer is showing off his prized horses.  The ventriloquist decides to have a little fun with the farmer.  He asks the horse, "Hello, Mr. Horse!  How's the farmer treat you here?"

He then throws his voice; in a high, gruff voice, the "horse" says, "Terrific!  He brushes my hair and takes me out for rides every day!"

The farmer is standing there agape.  The ventriloquist smirks as the farmer looks the horse over in surprise.

They continue the tour.  The farmer takes the ventriloquist outside to the pig pen.  Again, the ventriloquist decides to have fun with the farmer.  He goes up to the nearest pig and says, "Hello, Mr. Pig!  How's the farmer treat you here?"

Then, pulling the same stunt as before, the ventriloquist has the "pig" respond, "Terrific!  He lets me roll around in all this cool mud, and slops me every day!"

The farmer is stunned.  The ventriloquist stifles a chuckle.

The tour continues.  They venture out into the pastures, and come by some sheep grazing.  He ventriloquist goes up to one of the sheep and says, "Hello, Mr. Sheep...!"

The farmer pipes up, "THAT SHEEP'S A FILTHY LIAR!"
jastroff
50%
50%
jastroff,
User Rank: Ninja
8/7/2014 | 5:48:51 PM
Re: ha ha
@nicky48 - that's a good one -- Home button

 

I have an amusing anecdote --

The phone rings at a user support office in a large University c. 1984. A very very well known professor is on the other end. "My computer doesn't work! My IBMPC doesn't work! It has all my drafts on it"


Well, what's the problem, I ask.

"There is no power when I flip the ON switch."

Ok, let me ask, is it plugged in to the wall?

Pause....pause...


"Oh thanks. Never mind."

Click

 
jastroff
50%
50%
jastroff,
User Rank: Ninja
8/7/2014 | 5:43:57 PM
Re: ha ha
Oh no @dave. I was a tech writer at Columbia Univ and I used to write error messages (as needed). I was headed down a strange path...
Joe Stanganelli
IW Pick
100%
0%
Joe Stanganelli,
User Rank: Ninja
8/7/2014 | 5:35:50 PM
Why did Facebook go public?
Because they couldn't figure out the privacy settings!
<<   <   Page 2 / 4   >   >>


The Business of Going Digital
The Business of Going Digital
Digital business isn't about changing code; it's about changing what legacy sales, distribution, customer service, and product groups do in the new digital age. It's about bringing big data analytics, mobile, social, marketing automation, cloud computing, and the app economy together to launch new products and services. We're seeing new titles in this digital revolution, new responsibilities, new business models, and major shifts in technology spending.
Register for InformationWeek Newsletters
White Papers
Current Issue
InformationWeek Tech Digest September 18, 2014
Enterprise social network success starts and ends with integration. Here's how to finally make collaboration click.
Flash Poll
Video
Slideshows
Twitter Feed
InformationWeek Radio
Sponsored Live Streaming Video
Everything You've Been Told About Mobility Is Wrong
Attend this video symposium with Sean Wisdom, Global Director of Mobility Solutions, and learn about how you can harness powerful new products to mobilize your business potential.