Let's say you hate your job and want to get yourself canned so you can get yourself some of that sweet unemployment insurance. Experts on a panel on service-oriented architecture at the InformationWeek Spring Conference Tuesday offered some handy tips to ease you on the road to unemployment.

Introducing security vulnerabilities and increasing downtime are two of the best ways to get yourself a status-building security-guard escort out the front door of your office, carrying your coffee cup and family photos in a cardboard box.

The half-joking discussion came up at the panel in response to a question from the audience. Jason Sharp, managing partner at Crossvale, an IT service provider, asked the panelists to suggest three ways to get fired by implementing SOA, and three ways to get promoted.

One great way to get fired is to introduce security vulnerabilities, said James McGovern, chief security architect for the Property and Casualty Division at The Hartford. SOA involves introducing XML payloads into the enterprise, which can be used to introduce denial-of-service attacks.

Introducing downtime is another good way to get the boot, said Bob Bongiorno, CIO and SVP, Employer Services, at Automatic Data Processing. SOA is particularly susceptible to increased downtime because it combines applications. ADP has a rule that applications must have 99.9% uptime. So if developers build an SOA portal that combines seven applications, that means each application's uptime must be increased to ensure that the overall package maintains 99.9% uptime or better.

The best way to get promoted is to increase revenue, said Bongiorno.

Sharp's question was prompted by a presentation earlier this morning, which included a quote from Harrah's CEO Gary Loveman, who said there are three ways to get fired from the casino chain: steal, harass women, or institute a program without having a control group.