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8/29/2014
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IT Vs. Seth Meyers: 5 Great IT Jokes

Readers responded to a call for IT humor with a pile of jokes and stories, in anticipation of Late Night host Seth Meyers' keynote at Interop. Here are 5 that stood out.

A few weeks ago I wrote a blog soliciting our community for IT jokes in anticipation of comedian Seth Meyers’ keynote at Interop New York.

The response was fantastic! Readers posted jokes as well as humorous stories from their working lives. Popular targets include Windows and the help desk, but the subjects ranged all over the IT realm—you know you’re dealing with technology people when you get a joke about UDP (see below).

A few jokes about traveling salesmen and farm animals, which had nothing to do with computers, also made it into the comments. Is it too much to ask everyone to stay on topic?

I combed through the responses to share five that I thought were worth noting. I chose the jokes using the utterly unscientific method of grabbing the ones that made me laugh hardest.

On the off chance that Seth Meyers reads this, I don’t anticipate he’ll be worried about his job security. But at least he can be confident his Interop audience will have a sense of humor. Maybe not a great one, but something he can work with.

And now, the jokes:

If Apple made a car, would it have windows?

(submitted by nicky48)

 

Q: Why are all the meals at Google free?

A: Because all those nerds with lunch money would attract too many bullies.

(Submitted by vnewman2)

 

I've got a really good UDP joke to tell you, but I don't know if you'll get it.

(Submitted by SaneIT)

 

Q: Why did Facebook go public?

A: Because they couldn't figure out the privacy settings!

(Submitted by Joe Stanganelli)

 

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.

(Submitted by ClareCM)

If you think you can do better (and frankly the bar isn't that high), you're welcome to post a joke or story to the Comments section below.

Register now for Interop New York for hands-on training, educational sessions, peer networking, and some fun! Interop New York happens September 29 to October 3 at the Javits Center.

Drew is formerly editor of Network Computing and currently director of content and community for Interop. View Full Bio
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ron.cleaver
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ron.cleaver,
User Rank: Apprentice
8/31/2014 | 2:10:27 PM
A funny story.
True story. Many years ago a guy was writing a term paper on human evolution using an acient machine with a primitive editor.  He worked for a long time before saving his work.  He finally decided to save the file.  The editor of course asked for a file name.  He entered "mankind."  He then got an error message, "mankind cannot be saved."

 
Henrisha
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Henrisha,
User Rank: Strategist
8/30/2014 | 1:30:38 PM
Re: Binary
"Then there are the machines that display 101 errors when you give them your code." Love the jokes! So to those who think IT folks have no sense of humor... think again. Lol!
H@mmy
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H@mmy,
User Rank: Moderator
8/29/2014 | 5:18:20 PM
Binary
"There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary numbers and those who don't"
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