IT Dress Code: 10 Cardinal Sins
You don't need to be a runway model to succeed in IT, but please stop making these office fashion faux pas. Remember, you work for an enterprise, not on the Enterprise.
![](https://eu-images.contentstack.com/v3/assets/blt69509c9116440be8/bltf42e6052b4821389/64cb582b771c7246563cdf3e/Trekkie.jpg?width=700&auto=webp&quality=80&disable=upscale)
(Image: Simon Zirkunow)
Hey, you over there. Yes, you -- in the short-sleeve plaid button-down shirt and khakis. Straighten out that pocket protector and step into the conference room. We need to have a few words with you. We're the fashion police.
If only there was, in fact, a set of statutes -- and a corresponding law enforcement agency -- to save us all from ourselves when dressing for work in the morning. So many felonies of fashion and misdemeanors of mode could be prevented each and every year. Careers protected, reputations saved, unsavory gossip mills shut down for good. Alas, we're mostly left to our own devices when it comes to our appearance, and while we'd like to think we're adults who can reasonably dress ourselves, somehow bad decisions continue making their way into cubicles and conferences rooms with alarming regularity.
So if you put the casual in "business casual," have food stains on your sweatpants, or treat the office like your own personal gym locker room, by all means, keep reading. This is for you. Trust us.
We're not here to give you a makeover, mind you. Doing so would be allowing the inmates to run the asylum, to be honest. There are far better sources for fashion advice. And there's nothing wrong, per se, with sticking to the conventional and subdued when it comes to workplace attire. In fact, some of the questionable choices we're going to harp on here are probably the result of trying too hard to be too fashionable, cool, trendy, or whatever other word you want to substitute.
Rather, we're after the "oh, no" clothing and appearance decisions, the kind that tend to generate raised eyebrows and the "Did you see what [X] was wearing?" conversations behind your back. These are the fashion choices that might have a perfect context elsewhere in your life -- but work isn't that context.
Just as we might sometimes try a little too hard for our own fashion good, there are those among us who grossly misinterpret the meaning of the word "casual." It's a lasting artifact of the first dot-com boom, the offices where soccer sandals and flip-flops are de riguer. Maybe we don't need to dud up in suits every day, but a decent pair of shoes might still behoove everyone.
Then there are variables of common sense -- and common decency -- to consider. No, we don't want to talk about the sprawling ERP upgrade with you while you're sporting super-snug bike shorts and an equally form-fitting tour jersey. That's just awkward, your upcoming triathlon notwithstanding.
Look, you can keep the pocket protector and the short-sleeved button-down shirts. They've earned their rightful place in the chronicles of IT. But let's all commit to avoiding the graver fashion choices.
Read on for our list of fashion sins. Dare to defend these? By all means, chime in. Better still, tell us the weirdest, wackiest, or flat-out worst thing you've ever seen someone wear into the office. We'd love to hear about your coworkers' fashion disasters. We're sure there are some doozies -- share your nominations for the Fashion Hall of Shame in the comments.
Sandals and socks are each fine innovations in foot comfort that should never, ever been worn simultaneously. Stop it. Now. Yeah, we hear your gripes and rebuttals about comfort, yadda-yadda. What you do with your sandals and socks at home is your business; just don't strut through the halls of an actual business in them.
Some folks can pull off open-toed footwear at work. You're probably not one of them. And even if you spend your weekends in a pedicurist's chair, there's a big difference between an open-toed pair of Manolo Blahniks and a pair of flip-flops. Feet are for beaches and podiatrists, not conference rooms and daily scrum meetings. Save the Birkenstocks for your camping trip in Big Sur next weekend.
Writer and satirist P.J. O'Rourke said it best: "A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat." Ladies and gentlemen alike, we beseech you: Doff the hat before entering the office. It may look great when you're at a coffeehouse or out for drinks after work. Not so much while managing software updates or provisioning virtual machines.
Hey, great: You work in a cool, casual office where you're encouraged to be yourself, where shirt-collars and full-length pants are seen as "legacy" attire that inhibits creativity and innovation. That's super. You still can't wear jorts, whether hand-made or the off-the-rack variety (pictured). Jeans are a great fit for a casual workplace. Shorts could be, too, if it's truly that casual. Jorts are a great fit for a trash can.
Those flannel pajama pants look sooooo comfortable! They also look soooooo ridiculous when you're sitting at your desk in your place of gainful employment. Sure, the boss has been asking you to put in some long nights, but she wasn't inviting you to a slumber party. Here's a career-safety rule of thumb: Never wear to work anything that you would also wear to bed.
Hey, we love Star Trek as much as the next person. And if a portion of your closet is devoted to wearing your fandom out and about, then more power to you. Just remember that you work for an enterprise, not on the Enterprise. Dressing like a crew member would be illogical.
Bonus tip: the same rule applies to any show or movie with the word "star," "starship," "galaxy," "Galactica," or "space" and other space-related terminology in its title. You may indeed be an information security Jedi, but that doesn't mean you get to dress like Obi-Wan Kenobi at work.
Do you bike to work to save on commuting costs, reduce your carbon footprint, and improve your health? All wonderful things. Now please change immediately before any of your coworkers see you in your cycling outfit. It fits you, um, extremely well.
Make no mistake: Exercise is a wonderful thing. It will make you feel better. But like our cyclist colleagues, the clothes we exercise in should not double as the clothes we work in. There's too much Lycra (codename for Spandex) and other "stretch" fabrics. There are too few sleeves. If you feel the need to wear wicking material while monitoring the network or rebooting a server, something's amiss. Ditto yoga gear, track pants, and other fashions of the (occasionally) fit. You're in an office, not a CrossFit gym. Dress accordingly.
There's a certain je ne sais quoi about the masculine beard. You're smart yet rugged, able to handle Hadoop clusters during the week and a chainsaw on the weekend with equal aplomb. But at some point, smart-and-rugged turned into Sasquatch. It's not a beard, it's an ecosystem. You're sending the wrong message. Are you an IT wizard or an actual wizard? Nobody's seen your neck in months. Maybe set aside a small slice of that paycheck and invest in a trimmer, Gandalf.
The odds of you actually showing up to work in your birthday suit are, we hope, very long. But sometimes people show a little too much skin, intentionally or not, in the office. Too few buttons (men and women alike, mind you), unzipped zippers, see-through fabrics, too-shorts -- no matter the offending attire, just do a mirror check once in a while, would ya?
The odds of you actually showing up to work in your birthday suit are, we hope, very long. But sometimes people show a little too much skin, intentionally or not, in the office. Too few buttons (men and women alike, mind you), unzipped zippers, see-through fabrics, too-shorts -- no matter the offending attire, just do a mirror check once in a while, would ya?
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